Network throats hawk Joe Boredom. Newspapers wrap virtually fish and Pelousy.
Refugees speak well-nigh no-kan-do Kamala. Donald’s newfound silence isn’t golden.
Comes now a never surpassing thing. Shove tweets. It’s D. Trump himself, once the dominant decisionmaker and most powerful person in the world, on a historic speaking tour. Former President Trump will provide a never-before-heard inside view of his administration. In itself that’s historic.
The idea’s an unprecedented December/January national tour prepped with superintendency and caution. Four venues. Start with Fort Lauderdale, Houston. No grand banquets. No hustling franks. A Q-&-A history of Trump’s administration.
Exactly how things were workaday as well as what did not turn out well. “President Donald J. Trump’s Conversation with Bill O’Reilly: The History Tour.”
O’Reilly: “After Biden’s inauguration, the idea rummaged virtually in my throne two months. I flew to Mar-a-Lago April 4. I know the man 30 years. He asked how we do this. I said, ‘No pandering. No politics. It’s your handling of China, Putin, the economy, ISIS, getting the vaccine. I’ve washed-up the research. The key is it’s all history and people don’t plane know how or what. I’ll ask the questions. We’ll record it. Two hours 15 minutes. Hockey and basketball arenas that seat 18,000. My own production visitor books it.
“What’ll it accomplish? It’s to know what unquestionably happened. Frustrated millions never got very reports from anyone. They only heard haters. It’s what he did and why — and what he didn’t do. Look, he wants to make history? It’s this. No president besides Lincoln experienced this much hate. It’s not stuff flamboyant. It’s tell the people what you did and why. Tell us your four years. Get your version on record. Show us how it works. Anyone who loves their country champions self-ruling speech.
“So not to vaunt him, I put it in writing. A 45 minute Q-&-A oral history. Then intermission. People can have a cocktail. Some may plane need it. The Q-&-A will be on cards from the audience.
“Interested in the concept, he trusted me. He’s a businessman. He saw it right away.”
And then soft spoken, retiring O’Reilly grinned: “Who knows? Maybe I plane sing a few songs.”
Isn’t that nice?
The city, state, country, the world having such unconfined joy, comes now a reprise of a 1978 serial killer who killed five women in a spree. A film’s now stuff made of it tabbed “Rodney & Sheryl,” starring Anna Kendrick. Also, to add to that, what could be largest and merrier now than news that we’re moreover getting a redo of TV’s reversion game show “The Dating Game.” Oh boy, oh joy! What next? Fatty Arbuckle in drag? Rudolph Valentino with a hairdo cut?
Gavel bangs for Bailey
We just lost legal goliath F. Lee Bailey who secure sweeties such as O.J. Simpson and the Boston Strangler. Disbarred, did a little bit in jail, blew his retainers surpassing the cases started, had four wives, and carried a rabbit’s foot for luck. I knew him well. Once so front page famous that spectacle writer Bruce Vilanch’s answering machine chirped: “This is F. Lee Bailey.”
Clutch the pearls
The pandemic’s tartan housing game has now infected Greenwich, Conn., which for the most part is inoculated versus poverty. Parking on its crowded main drag, one local sniffed: “I hate all these villainous New York license plates that we suddenly see all over here. It’s an infiltration. Disgusting to have these people invading us.”
True story. This well-to-do Park Avenue couple needed a housekeeper. A highly recommended helper came for an interview. Wages, hours, duties were set, everything OK until this possible employee saw the husband in flipside room — age 90 — and reclining. Said this possible helper suddenly, “No, thanks. I don’t want this job. I’m looking for longtime permanent employment.”
Only in New York, kids, only New York.